Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Guess who's a pain in my ass

Seriously, guess.



Give up? Maybe... MY BOYFRIEND? (henceforth known as boyface... everyone gets a pseudonym!) So, his birthday was Saturday. Woo! Celebration! Let's eat cake! ...oh wait, we did that. And I wish I'd taken pics to share. It was a giant cupcake, and it was DELICIOUS (red velvetttt), but I digress.

Part of his birthday gift was a stuffed dog from the dollar store. Now, for Valentines Day, I got him a similar stuffed animal, same body, same giant head, same dollar store, but it was a monkey, and I knitted him a sweater, just for shits and giggles. Little did I know that when I delivered the dog, he would have to be kept separate from the monkey because - pay attention, now - the dog doesn't have a sweater, and if he sees that the monkey has one, he'll get jealous.

THE STUFFED DOG IS JEALOUS OF THE STUFFED MONKEY BECAUSE THE STUFFED MONKEY HAS A SWEATER AND THE STUFFED DOG DOES NOT.

Oh, and he'll get cold (because that's SUCH a problem for stuffed animals in the middle of summer)

And of course, I gave in. I knitted the damn dog a sweater.


















And here it is, modeled by Mr. Elephant, who is of identical proportions.
























The colors are way off. I have no idea WHAT my camera is trying to pull. Those orangy stripes? Those are red. Like, ruby slippers red. Hopefully there will soon be a new, wonderful camera in my possession that doesn't make colors all dingy and nasty like this one. That has nothing to do with this sweater.

So what did I learn? 30 stitches on size 7 needles with worsted weight yarn is FAR too many for a 5.5" stuffed animal. The sweater is so bulky, it makes him look fat. This could also have something to do with the fact that I used Red Heart Super Saver and Bernat Super Value to accomplish all of this.


The real important thing about today? I bought things.

These things aren't just things, though. First, another pair of size 4 needles for a sweater thing that's cast on and has one row completed... and then I lost a needle. What? It could be in my car. It could be at boyface's house. It could be floating around my house, giggling at me. Personally, I think the mice took it. I bought Boye instead of Susan Bates this time, thinking the more masculine name might be a deterrant from the needle theiving bastards.

I seriously considered sock yarn, as I have never knitted socks before, but as I mentioned earlier, who in their right mind would pay $12 for a pair of socks?? So I bought this instead...


















Simple, purple, acrylic yarn, you say? Look closer, kids, and you'll see that it's not just purple, it's HEATHERED purple. Better yet, it is Plum Mist Heather (though Bruyere Prune Brume makes me giggle). I saw it and it TOOK MY BREATH AWAY. I nearly passed out dead in the aisle at Michaels. This is the most georgous yarn I've ever seen in my life and it is almost as soft as silk yarn. The dark green (that I didn't buy) is almost as beautiful as this yarn, though no photograph (especially with the camera of doom) will ever do the colors justice. I chose to make the cabled hat that's on the label. I will cast on... eventually.

Also, I have decided that neither Boyface, nor Brother 2 love me because they did not get excited about my yarn. They didn't even feign excitement. Brother 2 told me that he "sees yarn every day" (he works at Joann's) and "it's not exciting". Boyface didn't even respond to the text message.

In the mean time, here it is modeled by my wonderful new silver box that I discovered at the Salvation Army today


















Yes, that box was $3. Yes, it is tarnished to HELL, but I enjoy polishing silver, finding the sparkling jewel that's under all of the darkness.

More on the box later. First, cheap stashness

I bought these last weekend and Gibraltar Trade Center.


















Those two grey ones at the top? Those were $1 each. I am clearly not above knitting with acrylic yarn. I understand that wool, silk, bamboo, and cotton are all wonderful things to touch and craft with, but you need to understand that I am cheap and broke and not about to spend $6 for 1 ball of 50 grams of yarn.

The bottom 5 balls? 75 cents a piece. I bought 6 of them, and I couldn't even begin to tell you where the 6th one is. This could be blamed on my inability to keep order in ANY part of my life, but it could also be blamed on the mice, which I prefer.

So, I love this yarn, but what do I do with 330 yards of bulky weight, "salt and pepper" yarn? The label has a pattern for a scarf but... honestly, how many scarves does one person need? And the grey? Sorry, "taupe" (I SWEAR taupe is more tan than this yarn. It looks grey to me.)? What do I do with 620 yards of that??

I'm searching for a scarf pattern that has a hood. Maybe I'll use one of these for that if I ever find it.

As for the box...








































mmmmmmm... oxidization.......

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